By Leslie Senevey
Two of the best gifts I’ve ever received are pens and soggy Chinese food. You may be wondering about my taste level right now, but let me assure you, I like nice things. A lot. So often, though, the best gifts are the ones we couldn’t have seen coming but that make us feel seen.
If you know me, or if you read my last column in the September/October 76107 edition, you know I have a bit of a pen problem. Do I covet pens more than diamonds or gold? No. But also, yes. (Let’s just say, if the pen is mightier than the sword, my house is quite protected.)
Once, when my dear friend Annette and I met for lunch after not seeing each other for a while, I showed up with a bouquet of flowers for her. She brought me a bag of pens. I might have gotten a little choked up. Proof that gifts don’t have to be fancy or expensive to be meaningful.
My husband has given me many wonderful gifts over the years, from flowers to jewelry to trips. But once, after a business trip, he came home with a one-of-a-kind present I’ll never forget. He brought me my usual order from our favorite New York Chinese restaurant.
That styrofoam to-go container had to endure airport security, the three-and-a-half-hour flight from La Guardia, the ire of passengers who had to smell it for the duration, and the half-hour car ride home from DFW before it got to me. By the time my husband and his unexpected gift arrived, I was in my pajamas and had already eaten dinner. But that cold, soggy Sweet & Sour Sensation was one of the most memorable things I’ve ever eaten.
Gifts have the power to make us feel known and appreciated for who we are. A well-chosen gift means someone thought about you and what might bring you pleasure or joy. It means they spent money or effort or both on a quest to bring a bit of happiness into your life.
Sometimes gifts are a tangible way for someone to show they care. My dad’s “dad gifts” are legendary in my family. None of us has ever jumped up and down when receiving car emergency kits, furniture sliders, Swiss Army knives, Fix-a-Flat or wet vacs, but we all appreciate the sentiment behind these presents. We understand this is one way Dad feels like he’s taking care of us when he’s not actually there to take care of us.
While gifts are not the reason for the season, they are definitely part of the tradition. And aren’t traditions really the backbone of the holidays? All the rituals, customs and expected occurrences connect the dots between the years — and even generations — like the stitching in a family heirloom quilt.
It might be your mother-in-law’s famously dry Thanksgiving turkey, Uncle Bob’s snoring when he falls into a tryptophan coma while watching the Cowboys afterward, or your annual day-after breakfast of leftover mashed potatoes and pecan pie. (No judgment here. Holiday habits are highly personal.)
Maybe it’s matching ugly Christmas sweaters, the cacophony of curse words that practically turn into a carol every Christmas Eve around 2 a.m. while assembling toys, Aunt Trudy’s matzo ball soup, or the annual movie night screening of “It’s a Wonderful Life.”
For our crew, it’s “Elf.” We are unashamedly low-brow. How low-brow, you ask? When my kids were little, I used to scoop the dog poop out of the backyard, relocate it to the front yard and sprinkle it with glitter. Then on Christmas morning, we would take them outside to see the reindeer poop. (If that’s not some holiday magic making, I don’t know what is. Follow me for more heartwarming holiday ideas.)
We do have some more traditional traditions too. Our non-negotiable Happy Holidaze playlist. Contributing to our Gratitude Box. Making homemade salsa for neighbors. Hosting Christmas Day lunch.
Whether standard or silly (hello reindeer poop), traditions are touchstones that can connect us to times past and carry meaning and memories into the future. Like gifts, they don’t need to be grandiose to be special. They just need to be personal. Because traditions, like ugly Christmas sweaters, are not one size fits all.
Speaking of gifts, I have one for you. Sharing a portion of my family’s beloved Happy Holidaze playlist with you here. You can find and listen to the whole thing on Spotify under my profile, Distracted by Pretty Things.
Jing-A-Ling, Jing-A-Ling
The Andrews Sisters
Linus and Lucy
Vince Guaraldi
Happy Xmas (War Is Over)
John Lennon and Yoko Ono
It’s a Marshmallow World
Jo Stafford
We Wish You the Merriest
Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby
Cool Yule
Louis Armstrong
Winter Wonderland
Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga
Mistletoe and Holly
Frank Sinatra
It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year
Andy Williams
We Need a Little Christmas
Johnny Mathis
Dig That Crazy Santa Claus
Ralph Marterie
Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy
The Endless Orchestra
You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch
Thurl Ravenscroft
Happy Holiday
Bing Crosby
Sleigh Ride
The Ronettes
Holiday Road
Lindsey Buckingham
Santa Baby
Eartha Kitt
Believe
Josh Groban
Candy Cane Lane
Sia
Baby It’s Cold Outside
Zooey Deschanel and Leon Redbone
Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow
Lena Horne
Leslie Senevey is a lifelong Fort Worth writer, former dance teacher, sometime decorator and full-time dog and cat mom. Her human kids live in LA and New York. Besides butterscotch pudding parfaits, driving around looking at light displays, and sipping hot tea by the decorated tree, there’s no holiday tradition she looks forward to more than having her kids home. You can find her publication, Distracted by Pretty Things, on Substack.